Friday, April 30, 2010

The New Life

And this is what it was like for my first day as a stay-at-home-mama:

Against the will of my own, my first day of corporate freedom began at 4:55...IN THE MORNING! Yes, since I am now the "stay-at-home-mom", Kyle has deemed it my full responsibility to deal with Smalls and his before-the-sun-rises yelps. Alright, I can kind of see where this is fair...IF I HAD THE ABILITY TO NAP IN THE AFTERNOON! But no...no naps for me. Oh, you're asking me why? Here is why:
  • I have an 8 1/2 month old son who is completely mobile, likes to stick anything he can get his hands on into his mouth (yes, even dust bunnies), eats every 3-3 1/2 hours, cries if he is not within 3 feet of me, and whimpers for me to hold him when he starts getting tired. Oh, and it's not like you can just lay this man down when the signs of "need a nap" begin to show themselves. You have to wait until he has yawned at least twice and is rubbing his eyes. If you lay him down before either of those, you're only fighting a losing battle. Baby ALWAYS wins.
  • When Broden goes down for a nap, that is my only chance to do anything that requires either the use of two hands or walking from one room to another faster than he can crawl. Or to perform nasty tasks in which you don't want little fingers involved in (more details to follow).
  • ANGEL NEVER STOPS BARKING!
Now that I have clarified that being home all day doesn't mean soap operas, oreos, and princess naps, I will move on.

First, it was so amazingly awesome not to have to push Vada out the door with one foot while balancing on the other, holding a 17 pound baby on my left arm and a backpack, a purse, and my breakfast drink in my right hand. Instead, she woke up, took her time eating breakfast, took her time getting dressed, and watched Avatar while I combed her hair and fed Broden. When it came time to leave for school, we loaded ourselves in the car without a fear of being late and dropped Vada off for one fine Thursday of first grade learning.


While we were getting Vada out of the car, Broden was LIVID! How dare he have to sit in his car seat while the car was in park! Didn't I know better?! He fell asleep on the way to the grocery store. Yep, there is nothing more awesome than having your 8 1/2 month old teething son finally fall asleep in his car seat, only to have to take him out 5 minutes later to walk around the grocery store picking out fruit. At first he was still in that half-asleep haze, but after a few minutes he was in full on I-want-to-touch-EVERYTHING mode. Though, it was glorious not to have to maneuver my way around 50 people in one isle while trying to steer my cart one handed because I have an infant in the other. I'll take an empty grocery store and a handsy infant over weaving my way through hundreds of people in high heels during a one hour lunch break any day.


After unloading the groceries and laying Broden down for a proper nap, I went to water our tomato plant. And look what I found! Our first little baby tomato! Now you're asking yourself: "Wait, she bought one more thing to take care of? She is insane!" Yes...I AM insane. On our trip to Home Depot this weekend to buy 1/3 of the concrete we needed to lay a slab for our dog kennel (mmhmm, measurements were wrong...twice. It took 3 trips to Home Depot on Saturday to get it right. And let's just say that it was not my job to measure.), I caved when I saw the pretty tomato plants sitting on the sidewalk. We picked up what we thought was a cherry tomato plant, but someone stuck this one in the wrong container. We didn't realize this was really a Lemon Boy until we brought it home. Oh well, they'll still be delicious!


Once our yet-to-be-named tomato plant was fed, I decided that since Broden was catching some z's I would clean out my sink drain. I hadn't been able to use my sink for about 3 days since it was taking a year for a cup of water to drain. Um...yes...it was revolting! I won't even go into full detail with this one because I'm trying to encourage people to read my blog, not unfollow it. I'll just simply say this: the majority of what was in that drain had to have been from the previous home owners, and not one drop of anything landed outside of that Care Bear garbage can. Heck yes! One step closer to landing my dream career...as a plummer.


Real quick, I would just like mention that I believe Angel has an internal clock that triggers her barking. I put both the dogs out back around 5:30 every morning, weekdays and weekends. And no, weekdays are no different than weekends for her I have come to find out. At around 7:30 every morning is when the barking commences, and it's all her. And...SHE DOESN'T STOP! Maybe for about 10 minutes here or there, but not long enough to enjoy a barkless nap if I had the time. This is when I love Smalls the most.

Anyways, back to my first day of corporate freedom: I dropped Broden off with my dad after lunch and went to spend a gift certificate that I received for Christmas. I had been waiting for the perfect opportunity to use it, and I thought I had picked a darn good time. If you haven't guessed already, my gift certificate was for a one-hour massage. I had been to this place once before and thought it was decent, but the guy that worked on me this time (haha, that could sound so wrong) wasn't worth the gift certificate. I mean, I'm not even sore today. After a good massage, you're supposed to be miserably sore the next day! The only thing I have today is a headache, and I'm pretty sure the credit belongs to the dogs for that one.

Once I was out of there I headed on over to Serenity Salon for my hair appointment. I was secretly afraid that my super pregnant hair dresser was going to burst before my appointment, but thankfully her little stud muffin decided to be nice and hold off a while longer. I just want to tell you how much admiration I have for pregnant woman everywhere who spend their entire days on their feet until the day they pop. The determination they have to do their on-your-feet-all-day jobs until they absolutely can't is astounding. I would cry. And this where I admit how lucky I was to have a job that required me to sit at a desk all day with my feet propped up on my modem. Even though, when you're on the verge of exploding, nothing is ever really comfortable.


A little something to leave you guys with: my baby gate battle wound. I was attempting to step over the baby gate to hand the phone to Kyle with Broden on my hip. Well, I didn't left my back leg quite high enough and I went crashing down. My body so badly wanted to land flat on my stomach, but I was determined to make this nothing more than a mini roller coaster ride for Broden. I bent my right leg and took it all on the knee, bringing the gate down with me. What made this even worse? The fact that we had our neighbors over for dinner for the very first time, and now they will never trust me with their 2 year old daughter. Cool. I have now become the stupidly crazy mom who lives in the house with the dead lawn, very healthy weeds, and annoying dogs that you want to feed chicken wings to so they will FINALLY shut up.

1 comment:

The Prettiest Mess You've Ever Seen said...

Could TOTALLY see you throwing chicken wings out the back window to your dogs!

Hope you start feeling better!